Here at Wilton Drive Online, we love our mommies and as most of you probably already know May is the month of mothers. Okay, well…maybe not, but it’s the month that includes Mother’s Day which is good enough for me.
So to honor our mommies, we are asking the residents of gay Wilton Manors, “Are you a good or bad gay son?” Â We’ll be posting YOUR answers leading up to May 8 when hopefully, ya’ll will be taking your moms out for some brunch or something.
To kick things off let’s take a look at Jarrett’s (pictured) answer in his own words. Â His claim is that he is a BAD GAY SON. DUN DUN DUNNNNN…
All things considered, my parents are better at being “gay” parents than I am at being a gay son. Let’s consider the evidence, shall we?
1. My mom & dad are founding PFLAG members in their hometown. I have never been to a PFLAG meeting. They marched in their first Gay Pride Parade a few years ago. Although I attended the National Equality March in DC to advocate for repeal of DADT, I have yet to properly celebrate Pride at the local level.
2. My parents are still married after 34 years, while I have yet to tie the knot.
3. My mom is known throughout her region for very “gay” things. Like me, she is a writer/editor by trade. The difference being that while I pontificate on politics, she (with her degree in horticulture) has written pieces on home, garden and cooking which are rumored to be the envy of Martha Stewart. It is not uncommon to find her frolicking with her friends of every gender and orientation at lavish garden parties throughout the Midwest.
4. I didn’t “come out” to my mom as much as she asked me if I was gay at point-blank range.
5. My parents have two sons, both of whom are gay – a double whammy in their sleepy, conservative Illinois prairie town. Both of my parents are supportive of my brother who wins them ten times as many toaster oven points as I ever could. Clayton works for a popular hair salon in Chicago and organizes/promotes drag shows in his spare time. Of course, my mother has hardly missed even one of these shows.
Although I call home on every holiday and keep in touch on Facebook, I have not contributed my fair share to the overall gayness of my family. Due to this inconvenient truth, my mother is to be toasted and not roasted on (gay) Mother’s Day!
Yeaaaa, I’d have to agree with you, Jarrett. Â You do kind of suck at being gay. Â But that’s totally okay…wink wink! Â If any of you readers out there in gay Wilton Manors land would like to contribute to these posts, leave a comment with your email address and we’ll send you everything we need from you!
Thank you, Jarrett for being a crappy gay son!